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Onestone
There once was an Indian who had only one testicle and whose given name was 'Onestone'. He hated that name and asked everyone not to call him Onestone. After years and years of torment, Onestone ...
The problem
The problem with Barack Obama jokes: 1. His followers don't think they're funny. 2. The rest of the world doesn't know they're jokes.
A Very Bad Rider
Someone should teach this guy how to ride. Look for the scooter in the middle top and follow him. When you think it's over it's NOT http://biertijd.com/mediaplayer/?itemid=41302 ROD
American History
Some of these birthdates might be disputed, unless of course, the aliens also have time travel. 1947 - A Significant Year Some of you will recall that on July 8, 1947, a little more than 64 years...
The Farmers daughters
A Farmer had gone off to tend his crops one morning leaving his 3 daughters to take care of things at the farm house. While he was gone 3 salesmen had come to the house selling their wares. When ...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t6334-the-farmers-daughters
The affair
A man returning home a day early from a business trip got into a taxi at the airport. It was after midnight. While en route to his home, he asked the cabby if he would be a witness. The man suspe...
Wedding
I was at a wedding this weekend that had a DJ for entertainment, shortly after the garter removal and the dancing was to begin, the DJ prompted everyone to get close to the one that makes life wo...
my mom
my mom is so fat that the horse on her jordace jeans is real my mom is so fat that I had to take a tain and 2 busses to get on her good side my mom is so fat that when she plays hide and se...
Stopped by the police
An elderly man is stopped by the police around 1 a. m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night. The man replies, "I am going to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effect...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t5309-stopped-by-the-police
SUPPORTER
How do you starve an Obama supporter????????Hide his food stamps under his work boots
Cowboy tough
Three Cowboys were seated around the campfire out on the lonesome sagebrush praire and with the pride for which these men were famous; it was a night of bravado and tall tales. Tom, the hand from...
bra sizes
Have u ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the Letters used to define bra sizes? But couldn't figure out what the letters stood for. Well its time u became informed! (A) Almost t...
Economy
John Smith started the day early having set his alarmclock (MADE IN JAPAN ) for 6 am .. While his coffeepot (MADE IN CHINA) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN HONG KONG) He p...
Try this!
LOL!!! Maybe he could try this: Go out and get you a dog for some extra income. Read story below. This morning I went to sign my dogs up for welfare. At first the lady said, "Dogs are not eligibl...
Little Susie
Little Susie was not the best student in Catholic School . Usually she slept through the class. One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was sleeping. 'Tell me Susie, who created the u...
You might be ayuppie biker if:
You Might Be A Yuppie Biker If: If you drink cappucino instead of beer. If you cant figure out why the battery on your new bike won't stay charged. If your trailer has more miles on it than your ...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t4468-you-might-be-ayuppie-biker-if
Why American Healthcare Cost So Much
While in China, an American man is very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom the entire time he is there. A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t5478-why-american-healthcare-cost-so-much
Honesty....
I was sitting on the patio with my wife last evening. She was sipping on a glass of wine. Suddenly she says... "I love you so much, I don't know how I could ever live without you. I sweetly ask, ...
Old timers
Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Yuma, Arizona... They turned a corner and see a sign that says, 'Old Timers Bar - ALL drinks 10 cents'. They look at each other, and then go...
My life in an Outlaw Club
I have to own up to a dark period in my life. I now live a seemingly respectable existence, but there was a time when I lived as an outlaw biker….malcontent…..non conformist etc etc yes, all ...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t5329-my-life-in-an-outlaw-club
Screwed !
A young New York woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean, but just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young man stopped h...
Makes sense to me....
This is a story which is perfectly logical to all males: A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk, and if they have eggs, get 6." A short time late...
hollywood squares
Hollywood Squares: These great questions and answers are from the days when the Hollywood Squares >game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host...
For MOON!
(I hope he hasn't heard this one)-g Thibodeaux marches up to Boudreaux’s front porch and raps hard on the door and Boudreaux opens it. Thibodeaux say, “Boudreaux ! How long we ban frands ?”...
CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES
Ingredients: 1. 532.35 cm3 gluten 2. 4.9 cm3 NaHCO3 3. 4.9 cm3 refined halite 4. 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride 5. 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11 6. 177.45 cm3 unrefined C...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t4956-chocolate-chip-cookies
Lord, I Apologize For This....
A woman goes to the doctor, all beaten black and blue. The doctor asks, "What happened?" The woman says "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a p...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t4950-lord-i-apologize-for-this
What a real women does
A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and never let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day. She will inspire him to do t...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t4784-what-a-real-women-does
Cajun Math
Y'all know who this is for! Cajun Math A Cajun man wants a job, but the foreman won’t hire him until he passes a little math test. “Here’s your first question, the foreman said. “Without ...
Winter is coming...
One winter morning a husband and wife in central South Dakota were listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer Say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You m...
Cassies new shoes.
After becoming very frustrated with the attitude of a shopkeeper, the Cassie declared, 'Well, then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator and get a pair of alligator shoes for free!' ...
Bull Elephant
In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University .. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the...
Fox News...
A biker took his son the the zoo one day. While looking at the lions a little girl was leaning over the fence when a lion leapt-up and grabbed the girl by he shirt collar and dragged her into the...
ANOTHER BLONDE ONE
A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful (you guessed it) blonde. The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets. F...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t4296-another-blonde-one
What The Heck
On May 8th 2010 I had the honor of attending my Daughter's Graduation from U.K. Lexington Medical School. Living in middle Tennessee it puts me about 4.5 hrs south. I had to make the ride home in...
Skin Cancer
My riding buddy recently got the scare of his life when someone said he appeared to have skin cancer. I looked at it and said not to worry it was nothing. He replied your retired/retarded and its...
bus stop humor
As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to Come up to the height of the first step of the bus.. Slightly embarrassed and w...
Happiest old man in the world...
A 92 year old man goes into the doctors office for a check-up and the doctor asks him how he feels. "Doc, I have to say I have never been happier!" The doctor looks at the man and says "You are 9...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t4072-happiest-old-man-in-the-world
Fishing in the South
A Jack Daniels Fishing Story: I went fishing this morning but after a short time I ran out of worms. Then I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth. Frogs are good bass bait. Knowing the snake...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t4053-fishing-in-the-south
The all new Smokey and Cassie, talking shit thread
Instead of hyjacking anyone elses threads like we do I thought I would start a whole new thread. This is here for all to enjoy and please by all means post up. I promise yall, we are thick skinne...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t3207-the-all-new-smokey-and-cassie-talking-shit-thread
The old dog
One day an old German Shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of havin...
Darn Kids these Days!
Hope this isn't a repost! when I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t3918-darn-kids-these-days
THE SMOKING KOWALA
The little kowala bear was sitting up in his tree smoking a joint,a little lizard saw him and ask ,what are you doing the kowala invited the lizard to join him so he did,they smoked for an hour o...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t3898-the-smoking-kowala
Tell me this wont happen to us
FAMILY Three sisters ages 92, 94 and 96 live in a house together. One night the 96 year old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses... She yells to the other sisters, "Was I getting in or o...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t3886-tell-me-this-wont-happen-to-us
Good answers
These great questions and answers are from the days when ' Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions...
Smokey's deer camp
Four guys have been going to the same deer camp for many years. Two days before the group is to leave, Cassie puts her foot down and tells Smokey he isn't going. Smokey's friends are very upset t...
https://mcdarksiders.forumotion.com/t3782-smokey-s-deer-camp
My new truck
MY NEW TRUCK: I bought a new Toyota Tundra and returned it to the dealer because I couldn't get the radio to work. The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated. 'Nelson,' the salesma...
history
* LIFE IN THE 1500's * The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about...
Help
Hay yall, I've never asked for help from yall before, but I really need your advice. I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs are phone rings, but ...
stamp malfunction
The Postal Services created a stamp with a picture of President Obama on it. The Postal Service noticed that the stamp was not sticking to envelopes. This enraged the President, who demanded a fu...
If World War Two had been an online Real Ttime Strategy game, the chat room
*Hitler has joined the game.* *Eisenhower has joined the game.* *paTTon has joined the game.* *Churchill has joined the game.* *benny-tow has joined the game.* *T0J0 has joined the game.* *Roosev...